Call me nostalgic, but there was a time when physical, face-to-face interaction was the one thing many looked forward to. Getting home to play with your friends outside or spending time with family was considered a pleasure, not an obligation.
Today, family seems more of an effort than the intrinsic institution it was just 20 years ago. That is, at one point family was the foundation for the individual, providing moral, ethical, spiritual and principled guidance for the child and the family as a whole. The dinner table was the altar from which fathers evinced the tenets that gave rise to those characteristics of success such as fortitude, integrity and respect; and mothers instilled values such as compassion, tolerance and deference. Though not totally lost, I contend the dinner table’s significance in the American family has been greatly diminished and in some respects has been relegated to the “to do” list instead of being the priority. Moreover, family has been demoted in our society, making a cameo when schedules capitulate and the coffer of excuses fails to produce a feasible offering.
The vicissitude of our society is not new and, in fact, it is this mutability that has help create the great nation that we live in today. However, the price we have had to pay as a society to tout such an advanced, progressive nation is evident in the casualties we see strewn along the figurative highway. And, if you look closely, family is one of those casualties hemorrhaging from multiple orifices, asking for help in a raspy whisper, with one out stretched hand.
Children today are inundated with a myriad of electronic devices and virtual social escapes that have become bastions for their attention, robbing them of opportunities to interact with people and experience social norms and expectations. In fact, because of the proliferation of these virtual brain-suckers, I postulate that many children miss much needed opportunities to understand personal boundaries and social hierarchy, failing to see the inherent authority in their elders when sharing public spaces.
Honestly, I couldn’t imagine dropping an “F” bomb in front of any adult when I was a kid. Nor could I ever imagine challenging an adult who chose to admonish me for behavior that was interpreted as disrespectful or unbecoming; and God forbid if I became so emboldened to ignore all common sense and try my luck, the threat of telling my mother was the elixir to my stupidity. Try that threat now and you are likely to spark a verbal barrage of epic portions, one that is so laden with profanities that the late Richard Pryor himself would blush.
I distinctly remember there was a time when the family was the authority; a time where family was the moral compass, the governor and executioner of discipline (for some that was called the fear of God), and the quintessential ingredient needed to ensure strong character in a child. No, it didn’t matter if the elder was a blood-relative or an acquaintance with passing interest in your well being, you listened and gave deference regardless the relationship.
Though the days of leaving your front door open and kids playing liberally in their neighborhoods free of angst and suspicion are long gone, there is something to be said for bringing back family and the indelible knowledge and guidance it offers. Yes, many of us are busy and our kid’s schedules like our own are jammed packed with homework and a proliferation of countless practices that demand most of our time and attention. But just as we must take time to stop and nourish our bodies, the same is true for our person. And children need this time more than ever -- for leaving them to navigate the endless, gratuitous sex, violence and other mindless acts of moral turpitude that invade our lives through a cavalcade of electronic vehicles daily, has in some cases proven tragic and unconscionable!
Infomercials, talk show experts and self-help books enumerate a plethora of remedies for our modern day physical ailments and psychological obstacles. Yet, despite their claims, none can proclaim they are the king-of-the-hill and thus the panacea for all that is wrong, arcane or confusing in the journey of life. One thing I do know, however, is that family is a powerful entity that possesses innumerable treasures of wisdom, truth and conviction. These treasures are not hidden or buried but stand behind the sentries of love and temperance. And for those of you who took the time to read this passage, I share with you the username and password to relax the arms of the sentries of these treasures and unveil a world of enlightenment, love, compassion, understanding and wisdom to name just a few virtues available if you desire. They are:
Username: Family
Password: Family (Oh, and one special character – YOU)
